Wedding speeches are one of the most memorable parts of any celebration, offering a mix of heartfelt emotion, humour, and storytelling. Whether you’re giving a toast or organising the lineup, speeches can add real meaning to your day.
Done well, they can bring laughter, happy tears, and applause—but without preparation, they can fall flat. This guide will walk you through everything you need to know about planning, writing, and delivering great wedding speeches.
Who Traditionally Gives a Speech?
Traditionally, wedding speeches are given by a select group of close family and friends. These include the father of the bride, the groom, and the best man, though modern weddings often expand beyond that. Brides, maids of honour, mothers, or even the couple together may also take the mic. Your speech lineup can reflect your relationships, not just tradition.
The father of the bride usually opens with a warm welcome and personal stories.
The groom typically thanks guests, family, and toasts the bridal party.
The best man adds humour, anecdotes, and toasts the couple.
Modern couples may include brides, siblings, or close friends as speakers too.
When Do Speeches Take Place?
Speeches usually take place during the wedding breakfast, but the timing can vary based on your schedule. Some couples prefer speeches before the meal, others after dessert, and some break them up throughout the day. The key is fitting speeches into the flow of the day without making guests restless. Coordinate timing with your venue and caterers in advance.
Before the meal keeps guests attentive and speakers relaxed for the rest of the evening.
After the main course can maintain energy and save the best for last.
Splitting speeches between courses or events can keep things dynamic.
Always communicate timings clearly with your speakers and vendors.
How Long Should Wedding Speeches Be?
Short and sweet is almost always best when it comes to wedding speeches. While it’s tempting to cover every memory or thank every person, guests appreciate speeches that are focused and well-paced. Aim for meaningful rather than meandering, and consider the total time if you have multiple speakers.
Aim for 5–7 minutes per speech as a general guideline.
If multiple people are speaking, try to cap the total at 30 minutes.
Practice with a timer to avoid going over or under time.
Keep it engaging with a mix of heart, humour, and brevity.
What Makes a Great Wedding Speech?
A great wedding speech strikes the right balance between sincerity and storytelling. It should reflect your personality while focusing on the couple, celebrating their journey, and entertaining the audience. Preparation and authenticity are more important than trying to be overly polished or funny.
Speak from the heart and focus on what the couple means to you.
Include light humour and memorable anecdotes, but avoid anything offensive.
Use a clear structure—an opening, a middle story, and a toast to finish.
Don’t forget the audience is a mix of ages and backgrounds—keep it inclusive.
Dos and Don’ts of Wedding Speeches
Understanding the dos and don’ts can help speakers avoid common pitfalls and deliver a memorable toast. Knowing what to say—and what to avoid—is key to keeping your speech appropriate, engaging, and appreciated. A little tact goes a long way.
Do keep the tone warm, respectful, and celebratory throughout.
Don’t include private jokes, ex-partner stories, or embarrassing moments.
Do rehearse out loud, ideally in front of someone who’ll give feedback.
Don’t drink too much before your speech—save the celebration for after.
How to Prepare for Your Speech
Preparation is essential, even for confident speakers. Writing your speech well in advance gives you time to refine it, check the timing, and practise your delivery. The more comfortable you are with the content, the more relaxed and natural you’ll be on the day.
Start with a bullet point outline, then build it into full sentences.
Practise multiple times, preferably standing and speaking aloud.
Consider writing cue cards, especially for longer speeches.
Read it out loud to hear the flow and catch awkward phrasing.
Tips for Nervous Speakers
If the idea of public speaking terrifies you, you’re not alone—but you can still give a brilliant speech. Confidence comes with preparation, but there are also ways to calm your nerves on the day. Focus on the people you’re celebrating and remember: guests want you to succeed.
Practise deep breathing beforehand to steady nerves.
Make eye contact with a few friendly faces, not the whole room.
Keep a glass of water nearby in case your mouth gets dry.
Remind yourself that it’s not about perfection—it’s about sincerity.
Including the Bride, Groom, or Both
Modern weddings often move beyond the traditional "groom speaks" format. Brides, partners, or both together may want to express gratitude, share stories, or simply thank guests. A joint speech can be a lovely moment that reflects your dynamic as a couple.
Decide if one or both of you will speak and divide your talking points.
Keep it casual and conversational—it doesn’t need to be overly formal.
Mention each other’s families, shared memories, and future plans.
End with a joint toast to your guests or wedding party.
Managing the Speech Line-Up
It’s important to structure the order of speeches so they build momentum and maintain engagement. Whether you stick to tradition or customise the order, communicate clearly with your speakers. The goal is to create a natural, enjoyable flow without delays or awkward transitions.
A common order: Father of the bride → Groom → Best man → Others.
If you have several speakers, keep the order short and logical.
Introduce each speaker or have your MC announce them.
Let vendors (like your photographer or caterer) know the schedule in advance.
Making It Memorable for the Couple
A wedding speech should celebrate the couple in a way they’ll remember and treasure. Whether you’ve known them for decades or only recently grown close, your words matter. Focus on love, gratitude, and the uniqueness of their relationship to leave a lasting impression.
Share a favourite story that captures their connection or values.
Reflect on what makes their partnership strong, joyful, or inspiring.
Avoid clichés and keep your content personal and meaningful.
End with a heartfelt toast to their love, future, and happiness.
Conclusion
Wedding speeches can be one of the most touching, joyful, and memorable parts of your day—when done well. From knowing who speaks and when, to writing heartfelt words and delivering them with confidence, every step matters. Preparation, structure, and sincerity are the keys to success.
Whether you’re a bride, groom, parent, or best friend, your speech is a gift—one that celebrates love, honours connection, and adds emotion and meaning to an already unforgettable occasion. With these tips in hand, you’ll be ready to step up to the mic and make it count.
